If it's one common theme all of these food-related blog posts will share, it's how to tune into your body and it's needs. A big part of that, for me, is to ignore the "mind over matter" games I find myself constantly tangled up in.
Take for example, dessert. I'm definitely one who craves that "end feeling" of a sweet treat that follows a meal - and it doesn't always have to be filled with white sugar or covered in chocolate; sometimes it's dried figs, coconut butter filled dates (aka bites of heaven), or even something as simple as adding a bit of raw cacao powder to my afternoon coffee. Finding enjoyment in these naturally sweet treats makes me feel like I am still getting a "dessert" without ruining the healthy meal I just finished. However, when I want an equally healthy, equally natural, equally sweet Lara Bar - my brain won't allow the thought of having a granola bar after a meal. I mean, who finishes dinner and reaches for a granola bar!? Doesn't this mean that I'm just still hungry? That maybe I should whip up an extra veggie or have a bit more protein? Do I allow myself to acknowledge the fact that having this Lara Bar (ingredients: dates and nuts) is no different than me stuffing my own dates with walnuts or coconut butter? Nope! As far as it's contents, it's no different, but my brain can't wrap itself around this individually wrapped snack food as a form of dessert.
So, I reach for something sweet I can create myself. Though it's likely that I make - and eat - more dates and nuts on my own than if I were to have just unwrapped the damn Lara Bar. And, it's even more likely that whatever flavor bar I was craving contained different ingredients than the ones I had in the snack cabinet; when you're craving a Cashew Cookie Lara Bar and all you have are almonds, it's not quite as satisfying. But I try anyway by creating my own version, and typically end up standing at the counter stuffing date after date, and yet never filling that cashew void. So, I either move on to something else in a further attempt to find satisfaction, or end up eating the damn Lara Bar anyway knowing that it was the only way to put an end to this "dessert" that inevitably turned into a hefty nighttime snack. What. The. Hell.
My lesson here is clearly to listen to my cravings closely and, even if its directly after a meal, if I want a damn Lara Bar I should have the damn Lara Bar, and get over this mind over matter battle. Dates and nuts are a perfectly healthy "dessert" option, and even though it feels somewhat more "dessert-y" if I make it myself, actually unwrapping that one bar and enjoying it will prevent me from over indulging. If it's one thing I've learned about myself and the issue of the "unwrapping" - it's that I already struggle to do it once - so there's no chance in hell that I would ever reach for that second bar, ever. However, as mind over matter would have it, on nights that I cut up Lara Bars as treats for my girls, I doubt I would hesitate to reach for the extra chunk that would put me over that single bar serving size. See how messed up this is!? And how controlling your mind can be!? It's all how we think, and sometimes this thinking is absolutely, well, stupid. Though, it is this same thinking that has helped me control my love of almonds and other nuts (since I tend to over indulge in this department and am better off having none rather than trying to have some); big bad of almonds in the house? Bad. Bad bad bad. One handful will indefinitely lead to another, and another, and quite possibly another-nother-nother. But if I buy the "single serving" packs, I will only have the one. What is it about the packaging of Lara Bars that prevents me from enjoying it as a dessert, and of portion controlled almonds that prevents me from opening a second package? Oh, right, my brain. Silly brain. Good for almond control, bad for healthy, portion controlled after meal sweets.
On a non-food note, this mind of matter B.S. effects me in the gym, too. Case and point: back squats. I hate them. I suck at them. It is my weak point. Give me split squats. front squats, sumo squats - any other squat - and I can handle a good 30+ pounds more than I can back squat. No idea why (okay, some idea why, funky hip and knee structure) - but this is a lift that typically comes easiest to others. Not for me! And because I am all too aware of my struggle with this squat, mind over matter takes charge when it comes time to push the weight a bit. I'll start off with the adorably small plates. I crank out a few sets, slowly increasing weight as I go. Then, it's about that time; that time where I'm ready for even more weight, but that means (dun-dun-dun) switching to the ever-so-intimidating bigger plates. Even though this is likely only about 5 lbs more than I had on the bar for my previous lift, I let the size of the plates get to me. I start to question my ability to stand back up. I lose confidence. And, do you know what I do? I chicken out. Not out of the addition of more weight, but out of the bigger plates. So, what do I do? I just add more little plates. Same weight I would have increased to (and likely even added more cute-tiny-adorableness to the bar after that set) - but could not get under the bar with those bigger, heavier plates. Damn you, mind over matter!
We need to get out of our own heads. We need to tell mind over matter to shut the hell up and sit down. We need to know ourselves on the deepest level to uncover our needs, and in turn form healthy habits around them. We need to practice positive self talk and acceptance in order for these habits to be long lasting. Stop trying to talk yourself out of something (Lara Bar) because it seems unordinary (granola bar after a meal). Stop letting your mind create feelings of intimidation (big plates - ah!) when you could be building your own confidence (I got this!) Know yourself. Know your needs. Know what brings you feelings of completion and satisfaction. Know what builds you up and creates a desire for healthy continuance. When you are able to identify and give yourself what you need, it will feel good to be able to provide these things for yourself. These feelings of self-knowing create self-love when you listen to and respect them. In doing so, you create the best form of motivation there is: self motivation. When you are self motivated, you are not comparing yourself to others. You are not eating healthy or lifting more (or whatever it may be) because of someone else - or because you feel you should. You are doing it because you know that you are honoring your body and your needs. You feel good because of it, and you are creating long lasting habits for your ultimate health and happiness.
So, uncover those needs! Eat the granola bar after dinner! Get those heavy plates onto that bar! And know when your mind is more controlling than the matter at hand!
Now, the question is what recipe do I include here? Coconut butter stuffed dates are pretty, well, self explanatory, and I wouldn't be the best food blogger if I simply suggested going to your local Stop and Shop to pick up some Pecan Pie Lara Bars for dessert.
Since I am a chocolate lover - and a fan of an after meal treat - here's a recipe for homemade chocolate cups that are both healthy and satisfying!
Ingredients:
1/2 T coconut oil
1/2 T nut butter or tahini
1 t raw honey or pure maple syrup
1/2 T raw cacao powder
drop or two of vanilla
dash or two of Himalayan salt
optional add in: sprinkle of ground coffee (for a crunch and caffeine boost)
Soften the coconut oil (if solid) in the microwave. Add all other ingredients and stir until combined. Pour into a mini cupcake tin, and add an extra sprinkle of salt on top. If you like a more fudge-like texture, you can put it in the fridge until its firm. If you like the crunch of solid chocolate, the freezer is best.
*nut butters and maple syrup make for a more sweet treat, tahini and honey make for an amazing sweet and salty combo.
And quickly, a few health benefits of the ingredients in these delicious cups of awesomeness:
Coconut oil: According to an article from Dr. Axe, coconut oil's health benefits include but are not limited to balancing hormones, building muscle while decreasing body fat, improving digestion, energy, endurance and brain function, boosting the immune system, and reducing inflammation.
Nut butters: According to an article from The Road to Domestication, nut butters are high in protein, fiber, healthy fats, promote heart health, stabilize blood sugar levels, increase muscle and skin tone, and trigger the hormone leptin which tells us we are full.
Raw honey: According to creativeandhealthyfunfood.com, benefits of raw honey include powerful antioxidants, boosting the immune system, containing all of it's vitamins, nutrients and enzymes intact (when compared to regular honey), and promotes digestive health.
Raw cacao powder: According to justaddgoodstuff.com, raw cacao powder improves digestion, is extremely high in anti-oxidants, lowers blood pressure, pushes toxins out of your body, and increases blood circulation.
So, you can have your chocolate and be healthy, too!